So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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