Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
