is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
