And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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