Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Life is so much better after having sex.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
