she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
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