Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
and i looked up. we had an audience...
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Randomize
