He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize