Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I have post one night stand depression
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