Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize