I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
