I queefed so loud it echoed.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
