i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
is that a dick in a sweater?
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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