When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Randomize
