dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
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Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
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