You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
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