Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
