My boss' voice literally gives me gas
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Randomize
