I feel like I'm in dance class right now
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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