I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Dignity is for republicans.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
