Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
