You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Randomize
