I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
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