If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
