yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize