how can u be prego again
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
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