We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
