Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Every concussion has its silver lining
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Randomize
