Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
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