Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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