You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
