ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Randomize
