They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Randomize
