I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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