we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
