We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
COCAINE IS GR8
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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