if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
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