Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
no, he came in my armpit
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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