She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Randomize
