I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Randomize
