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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport

  Fav 40 4276 802

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.

  (1-785): View more from Kansas

  But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.

  Fav 26 9079 1292

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow

  Fav 10 1972 4533

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• (440): View more from Ohio

  WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!

  Fav 17 2903 1609

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  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (727): View more from Florida

  Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.

  Fav 6 2284 962

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• (913): View more from Kansas

  I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.

  (785): View more from Kansas

  When were you at my house?

  Fav 5 3280 1128

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• (909): View more from California

  I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.

  Fav 5 802 1743

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• (270): View more from Kentucky

  What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...

  Fav 4 959 616

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• (423): View more from Tennessee

  I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.

  Fav 5 932 563

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• 

  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (561): View more from Florida

  No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.

  (917): View more from New York City

  That's how he does EVERYTHING!

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• (661): View more from California

  Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?

  Fav 4 691 507

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.

  Fav 2 587 790

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen

  Fav 1 686 391

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• (331): View more from Illinois

  She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"

  Fav 4 139 207

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE

  Fav 1 126 66

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