K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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