Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
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