at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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