they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
people are starting to question the shark bite story
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Randomize
