Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Randomize
