it was like eating out sand paper
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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