question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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