Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
