it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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